*

There was a furious echoing strike of thunder—followed by immense silence that conquered the rest of the place. I felt the coldness of the wind clouting my pulse, and I could smell a pungent scent of a smoldering eucalyptus. My heart skipped a beat, and as I stare into space I’ve kind of anticipated what’s next… your arrival. 

You fell hard to the ground. The messy strands of your hair were intertwined with your halo that was as gold as the melting sun. And as you wipe away your tears like sparkling springwater drops, your face illuminates just like the night sky after the rain. Your eyes were stars—full of wishes and heavy secrets. Your broken wings were screaming for healing. Those freezing brittle bones were already on the verge of breaching. Your skin was scarred by yesterday’s hurricane, and when you saw your new bruises and scratches, I knew that you remembered how you’ve lost your battle all over again.

You managed to stand, and wandered around looking for something else. You were staggering like you’re intoxicated, and didn’t mind the grime on your cheeks. You were agitated and started talking in circles about finding the gate of heaven, and about how they left you once again.

I was just nearby, watching while you’re losing it. And I couldn’t help myself from approaching you…

So, I wore my heart on my sleeve. I grasped your arms and bargained,

“You could stay here, and we could act like normal people…”

My eyes were filled with hope that you’d agree, but—

There was an empty look on your face as you ebbed and said,

“I’m sorry, I forgot who you are… But if you think that you know me, help me find it, please.”

I was just staring at your eyes, then. I knew it, you’re gonna end up saying the same thing.

I held my head, seeking for reasons. I thought… maybe, you can’t really stay here. Maybe, you’ll always run away from whatever that doesn’t feel like home. Maybe, you’ll find your own way soon. Maybe all these maybes are enough to let you go—again.

As I let go of my grip from my head, I saw that your lips were chapped by all of these miseries. I wanted you to share them with me. If only I could get more than half of them, I would.

If only you’d come closer and let me hold you—

I’d solemnly give your bitter lips a cherry sealed kiss— ’cause for me, these are all a part of your pale explicit beauty, my failing but surviving angel.